Based on the ranking of princely titles, Li Yuanying should be a first-rank official. However, titles are just fancy words, and they really only matter within the confines of one’s fiefdom. (The phrase “one mu and three fen” refers to a small plot of land, symbolizing limited influence.)
In the court, Li Yuanying has little say. The highest official in the Honglu Temple is the Honglu Si Qing (卿, Minister of the Honglu Temple), usually a third-rank or senior fourth-rank official. It’s a leisurely post with plenty of perks, and many people spend their entire careers trying to get there.
The Honglu Si Qing is often a position people take on to retire. This time, the old Honglu Si Qing was about to retire, and Emperor Li placed Li Yuanying there as the head of the department. Li Yuanying wasn’t cut out to be a leader, he was rebellious and hard to manage. But, give him a leadership role and he’d thrive.
After failing to pull a few strings, Li Yuanying could only dejectedly send a message back to Wei Jiu, informing her that her husband wouldn’t be returning. He was being shoved into the Honglu Temple by his heartless elder brother and would be working his tail off, going out early and returning late. The letter was full of heart-wrenching words, sounding like a farewell, before finally asking Wei Jiu to take good care of his daughters and inquire about their satisfaction with their father-in-law.
Li Yuanying finished his long, rambling letter to Wei Jiu before grudgingly reporting to the Honglu Temple.
The Honglu Si Qing was about to retire and had time on his hands, greeting everyone with a cheerful smile every morning.
According to the Tang Dynasty law, officials generally retire at the age of 70. Those who don’t live that long usually work until their death. If someone held a higher position and was favored, they would often be persuaded to delay retirement.
Li Yuanying was impressed by the white-haired Honglu Si Qing, thinking that this old man was truly remarkable. He probably held office longer than the Tang Dynasty had been in existence! While Li Yuanying could be a bit of a rascal, he still respected his elders and was polite to children. He went up to the Honglu Si Qing and, according to custom, took over his duties.
The old Honglu Si Qing patiently explained the situation at the Honglu Temple to Li Yuanying.
Because the Honglu Temple was a leisurely post with generous benefits, it was a popular choice for those without ambition, and for good-for-nothing young masters who just wanted to enjoy themselves.
In short, almost everyone there was related to someone influential and lacked any skills, preferring to eat, drink, and be merry. There were more people kicking back and waiting to collect their salaries than those who diligently worked. Only a handful of professional translators were diligently doing their job, learning foreign languages and translating documents.
The old Honglu Si Qing used euphemisms, but that was essentially what he meant.
Li Yuanying was surprised to learn that under Emperor Li’s very nose, there was a department full of useless parasites. These people were even better at slacking off than he was!
What was even more infuriating was that the Honglu Temple had over a hundred staff members, and except for the Honglu Si Qing and the two Honglu Si Cheng (丞, Deputy Ministers of the Honglu Temple), none of them were eligible to attend court! This was outrageous! He was now the Honglu Si Qing, and besides having to show up at the department every day, he also had to attend the court meetings held on the first and fifteenth days of the month. These guys just spent their days idling away, not even needing to go to court.
Seeing Li Yuanying’s indignant expression, the old Honglu Si Qing assumed he was angry about others getting paid without doing any work. He tried to comfort Li Yuanying, telling him to turn a blind eye and just ignore them. After all, the Honglu Temple was a quiet department and had no major issues. It was best not to sweat the small stuff!
Ah, Prince Tang was still too young, his blood was hot, and he really couldn’t stand to see anything wrong.
The old Honglu Si Qing briefly explained a few unspoken rules of the court to Li Yuanying. Seeing that Li Yuanying was still fuming, he stopped trying to convince him. Ignoring things was also one of his life-saving secrets for making it to retirement. Since he couldn’t persuade him, he stopped trying. He was going home to enjoy his twilight years!
The saying goes, “A new official makes three fires.” Li Yuanying’s fire was blazing hot. After taking over from the old Honglu Si Qing, he gathered all the department staff, a hundred or so people, for a meeting.
Looking at the group of Honglu Temple officials who were slouching and couldn’t even line up properly, Li Yuanying was disgusted. He ordered everyone to assemble at the Imperial Guards’ training ground.
Everyone was baffled, thinking Li Yuanying had lost his mind, bringing them to a training ground. They were civil officials! What were they doing at the training ground?
Seeing them walk sluggishly, Li Yuanying was furious. He went to Li Chengqian and asked to borrow someone – just a regular Imperial Guard, no special requirements, just someone brave and loud. Li Chengqian was generous and lined up the guards for Li Yuanying to choose from.
Li Yuanying glanced around and saw a tall, handsome Imperial Guard, and his eyes lit up. He ran up to him and asked, “What’s your name?”
The guard stood at attention and answered, “My name is Xue Rengui.”
Li Yuanying nodded and said to Li Chengqian, “Let’s take this young Xue.”
Li Chengqian looked him over and also thought Xue Rengui stood out among the guards. Xue Rengui had only joined the East Palace recently. At the beginning of the year, when Hou Junji tried to seize control of the East Palace, Emperor Li had a fit and replaced a large number of the East Palace guards. Xue Rengui had been selected then, which showed his bravery.
However, Xue Rengui was already in his thirties, and Li Yuanying, still a young man, was calling him “young Xue.” This was just the kind of thing Li Yuanying would do! Li Chengqian generously said, “Is one enough?”
Li Yuanying snorted, “One is enough, more than enough.” He then asked Li Chengqian to lend him the training grounds, horses, bows, and arrows, explaining his preliminary plan. Since he couldn’t be idle, neither could anyone else. He needed to discipline these guys who wanted free salaries!
The Honglu Temple was responsible for external affairs, and its primary function was to receive foreign envoys. The current state of these officials was an embarrassment to the Tang Dynasty. Confucius had said that a gentleman should be skilled in the six arts, so he was going to have Xue Rengui train these guys. First, he would teach them how to form a proper formation, and then they would practice archery, riding, and swordsmanship.
Li Chengqian knew that the Honglu Temple was full of slackers and couldn’t be left unchecked. He told Li Yuanying to just focus on training his subordinates. If anyone had objections, he would report them to Emperor Li.
With Li Chengqian’s support, Li Yuanying was even more confident. He took Xue Rengui back to the training ground. He had Xue Rengui punish the few纨绔子弟 (wán kù zǐ dì, dissolute young masters) who arrived late, making them run five laps around the field, while everyone else watched from the sidelines.
The Honglu Temple’s staff began a period of hardship.
Li Yuanying wasn’t going to be part of the training. He held a watermelon that had been chilled in cold water, sat back on a lounge chair under a tree, and watched Xue Rengui drill his subordinates. He was completely relaxed.
News of what was happening at the Honglu Temple was quickly reported to Emperor Li. Specifically, the report detailed Li Yuanying’s disgraceful act of watching others train under the scorching sun while he ate watermelon. After a long day of government affairs, Emperor Li heard that Li Yuanying had sent a bunch of civil officials to the training ground for special training, and his eyebrow twitched. He took his entourage to the training ground to see what Li Yuanying was up to.
Just as Emperor Li reached the edge of the training ground, he saw Li Yuanying giving a speech: “Look at yourselves, what a sorry sight you are! You can’t even line up properly, and you’re already exhausted after just a little training. How can you represent the Tang Dynasty and receive foreign envoys? How can you represent the Tang Dynasty and travel abroad? Just thinking about it makes me ashamed. Keep going!” After giving them a stern lecture, Li Yuanying lay back on his lounge chair, lazily picked up half a melon, and continued eating.
Emperor Li stepped into the training ground.
Li Yuanying spotted Emperor Li’s shadow and immediately put down his melon and stood up.
Emperor Li asked, “What are you doing?”
Li Yuanying explained his noble intentions to Emperor Li. To make foreign countries feel the strength of the Tang Dynasty, these officials were the face of the dynasty! How could they be so shabby? If he wasn’t limited by regulations, he would have replaced them all with handsome and charming people. But he didn’t have the power to replace them, so he could only try to polish them up!
Li Yuanying gave Emperor Li the example of Wang Xuance (famous Tang Dynasty general) and said, “Look at these guys, which one of them can be as resourceful as Wang Xuance? If these people encountered a robbery by a foreign envoy, they wouldn’t even think of fighting back, they might even wet their pants! So, they need some serious training!”
Li Yuanying finished explaining his thoughts and pointed to Xue Rengui, whom he had borrowed from the East Palace. He said that even a regular Imperial Guard, like Xue Rengui, was different. His posture was straight, his appearance neat, and he just looked imposing.
Emperor Li simply asked a question, but Li Yuanying babbled on and on, giving him a headache. Following Li Yuanying’s finger, he indeed saw Xue Rengui standing out from the crowd.
Emperor Li knew that the officials in the Honglu Temple were all pretty idle, and since Li Yuanying’s explanation was somewhat plausible, he decided not to interfere and let him have his way. After all, compared to Xue Rengui, the rest of the Honglu Temple officials were truly a sorry lot, not presentable at all!
Li Yuanying was a master of taking advantage of situations, and now that Emperor Li had come to him, he was not going to let him leave easily. Li Yuanying excitedly ran to Xue Rengui and ordered him to call everyone to assemble so they could see who had arrived.
After training for half a day, the officials in the Honglu Temple had no fight left in them. When they saw Emperor Li, they were utterly despairing. From his attitude, it was clear he wasn’t here to rescue them!
Emperor Li listened to Li Yuanying’s pleas and gave the Honglu Temple officials a few words of encouragement before leaving.
With Emperor Li’s approval, Li Yuanying became even more arrogant. He wagged his tail and continued his training, warning them not to try to complain to anyone, or he would go complain about them first. Who wasn’t a good-for-nothing? Who didn’t have their parents to back them up? His elder brother was the most powerful man in the world, no one could go above him.
The officials’ faces turned pale as they were forced to take orders from the武官 (wǔ guān, military officials) whom they usually looked down upon, until they were exhausted like dogs.
In the afternoon, Li Yuanying didn’t bother to watch his subordinates train anymore. He slipped out and visited Xiao Deyan at the Hongwen Institute, excitedly telling him about how he had outsmarted his brother.
Seeing that Li Yuanying was still as cheerful as he was when he was a child, Xiao Deyan felt a pang of warmth. He kept Li Yuanying company and had tea with him before sending him to visit his grandchildren. Li Yuanying had gone to the Hongwen Institute to see his nephews and nieces. He swaggered over to find Li Xiang and asked him to take him to the kindergarten.
Li Xiang was delighted to see Li Yuanying and took him to introduce him to the children who were about the same age as him. They had already started learning, and the lessons were quite advanced. They had less time to play. Li Yuanying gave them all gifts and then led the group of young children, a whole procession, to see the even younger children.
Even before he got close, Li Yuanying heard a familiar little voice, the voice of his little niece Li Youyu: “No, you can’t be a general, you have to earn merit before you can be a general!” She spoke in a baby voice, but her logic was clear and convincing, capable of intimidating anyone. “If you want to be promoted to general, you have to listen to my orders and bravely fight the enemy. Otherwise, humph, I’ll make you a cook, and you’ll be making fires and cooking all day!”
Little Round Ball (referring to Li Yuanying) covered his face.
His little sister loved playing war games at home, and she hadn’t changed even after starting kindergarten.
**Author’s Note:**
Little King: Oh no, I think I’m falling for her, I want to steal their daughter!
Fourth Nephew: Get out of here!!!!
A delayed second update!
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